Saturday, March 30, 2013

Must Haves





The fashion world often recommends a list of “must haves” for every woman of style. The list usually includes items such as a basic black dress, a pencil skirt, a crisp white shirt and a jacket with a pop of color. I’m going to go on record by saying that my social calendar never demands a black dress, my hips will never jimmy into a pencil skirt, crisp and white lasts only until the first washing and the only pops of color on my jackets are a few coffee stains. A woman of style I am not.

I do, however, have a few other must haves. Since my time in the grocery store outnumbers my time in a clothing store at a ratio of 1,000:1, I’ll focus on the kitchen.

1) Mustard—I have at least 4 kinds. Dijon is the standard pick when I want to add just a little kick to my food. Whole grain mustard is my choice when I want a texture boost. Honey mustard is a nice addition to turkey or ham sandwiches. And last, but not least, is the big squirt bottle of the neon yellow stuff that is perfect for a color and taste boost to just about anything.

2) Cream—yes, I said cream. A little goes a long way when it comes to a finishing touch on, well, just about anything. I grew up on the stuff and I can’t seem to let it go. That blue milk will never do the trick in my book.

3) Onions, carrots and celery—the trinity of taste. There is something calming about chopping up a pile of vegetables and dropping them into whatever is on the menu for the day. Beats swallowing a multi-vitamin.

4) Cheerios—little O’s of go power. I eat them by the handfuls. I should probably have one of those cute little Cheerio snack containers that all the kids have, but I prefer to just shove them in my mouth, leaving a trail of oaties in my wake.

5) Saltines—plain, no sea salt or whole grain fanciness. There isn’t anything that doesn’t go with a saltine. It’s a platter for sweet or savory and is just the right size, even though one is never enough.

6) Chocolate Chips—by the handful or by the bag, good either way. Nothing says love like a batch of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies and I like to be prepared for a bake-a-thon when the mood hits.

7) Kitchen scissors—take these away and I’ve lost my right hand. Bags never seem to open along the “tear here” mark so I need back up.

8) Coffee—at the ready at all times. I’m not above reheating a leftover cup from the day before (addictions aren’t always pretty) but I prefer a freshly brewed pot.

9) Cheese—the eighth wonder of the world. Cheddar and parmesan are the base of all goodness. Feta, havarti, gouda and goat cheese fill in the gaps. There’s a reason we are told to say “cheese” when we have our picture taken. Who can be sad when cheese is on the mind?

I may not have a closet full of pencil skirts and crisp white shirts, but my coffee pot is always bubbling away. And if you are craving a ham sandwich, I’m sure I can rustle that up for you, too. Your choice of mustard.





Here’s a yummy mustard dip that would taste good on a napkin.  I prefer it with pretzels or veggies.

1 1/2 c. mayo
3/4 c. sugar (yes, that is the right amount)
6 Tbs. yellow mustard (from the big squeeze bottle)
1 Tbs. vegetable oil
Garlic powder and dill weed, to taste


Saturday, March 16, 2013

March





March is the horse latitudes of teaching. It is the time of year when the winds of progress stall out and there seems to be no end in sight as we bob along in the ocean of academic endeavors. Something or someone might need to be thrown overboard before our voyage can continue toward landfall. Oh, March, how you try my patience!

It is the time of year when I would love a dollar for every time a student looks at me and tells me his uncompleted assignment is “on my desk at home.” This coming from a student who hasn’t picked up a pencil most of the year during class work time. I am now supposed to believe that said student was overcome with self-discipline when he arrived at home. I’m also supposed to believe that the student somehow ignored the siren song of video games and chose to work at his fictitious desk so he could complete his assignments. Just give me another dollar for every time I dug through a student’s binder, miraculously finding a missing assignment, only to hear, “Hmm, I wonder how that got in there?”  Sigh.

It is the time of year when teachers can collapse into despair (or violence) when the copy machine flashes “paper jam” again. It always happens when one is in a hurry and there is a writhing snake of students on their way to one’s classroom. Choices are made in the heat of the moment and some of them are not pretty. Usually, plan B is launched and the copier is left to scream its message of doom to the next teacher who is in frantic need of a few copies. More chocolate, please.

It is the time of year when developing a new seating chart takes the wisdom of Solomon. Bucky can’t sit next to Sissy because they will talk all the way through class. Sissy can’t sit next Lucy because they are “not getting along.” Bucky can’t be across the table from Juno because Juno has a crush on Bucky and they will be making googly eyes at each other. (This lasts until the next text message in middle school). Zippy has to sit at a table by himself due to “attention issues”.  Juno is passive aggressive so she can’t be placed near the gentle students or she will rein quiet terror in the lives of others. Hard decisions are made. Sometimes it is best to seat non-workers with non-workers so that at least one of them is forced to do something during the next lab. “Special” seats are set up for those who can’t play nice in the sandbox. And, dare I say it, sometimes it’s time for a choose-your-own-partner activity so that the sweet ones can enjoy productivity together and the not so sweet can self-combust on their own.

It is also the time of year when I notice that my “babies” are growing up. They come to me with a fairly low reading on the mature-o-meter. As the year progresses, many of them start sliding over a few notches on the maturity scale. I see a student who doesn’t like to read, grab the sports section of the newspaper I put on the counter behind his desk. He actually turns the page because he wants to find out about his favorite sports team and not just because he knows he is supposed to turn a page every once in awhile so I think he might be reading.

I also get to see a student come bounding into my room with a picture she took of a hawk that had landed in her backyard. She needed help identifying the bird and wanted to use one of my field guides. Other students gather around the photo and spontaneously start sharing their backyard bird stories. Sweet music to my ears.

Yes, dear March, you try my patience. But, I know that the prevailing winds of refreshment are on their way. And they are called Summer.






Saturday, March 2, 2013

Dutch




If you have an e-mail address, chances are you've received a forward that starts with the phrase, “You know you are ………. if you……….”.  Rest easy. I am not going to start a new one called “You know you are Dutch if……”  Many of us are several generations away from our immigrant ancestors, yet we continue to maintain certain hidden rules. I am one hundred percent Dutch with the fair skin and blond hair to go with that pedigree. My ancestors were extremely conservative and placed a high priority on faith, family and frugality. Here are a few signs that you might be amongst my people. (You've been warned.)

Check a Dutch kitchen cupboard and you will most likely find a bottle of almond extract. We like all things almond. A favorite treat is called Bunket. It is a flaky pastry filled with an almond paste. It goes great with a strong cup of coffee and the crusty crumbs on your shirt taste just as good an hour later.

Check our stash of greeting cards. Chances are you won’t find any fancy dancy Hallmarky cards. We are not too keen on spending $5.99 for a card when something a little less pricey can carry the same sentiment. It’s more likely that we have a box of all occasion cards with flowery pictures and to-the-point greetings. Better yet, our box was purchased from the church’s ladies aid society, making it a win-win deal.

Most Dutch households have a stand alone freezer. Bigger bargains can be purchased if you have the freezer space. We also like to cook and bake. Without a freezer, there would be waste and that is just not acceptable. We procure our meat through locker plants so we don’t have to pay $30.00 or more for a steak dinner. Vegetables from our gardens nestle in by the protein in the freezer so we are prepared for a life without menus.

We borrow our books from the library at church or the downtown place. Spending money on something that is a one time read through is incongruent with our budget beliefs. There is always a chance that a new book will be a bust so being able to return it with no strings attached is a sweet thing. Borrowing books is also a way to spur one on to finish a book before the bell of the due date tolls.

Dutch folks are happiest when they've saved a penny or two. This includes the two for one meal deals, discount store bargains and closeout sales. Buying something for full price is tantamount to using good china for an everyday meal. It’s just not done. And, heaven forbid, we are forced into buying something at its full retail cost.That is a secret that goes to the grave with us.   

My people like to use stuff until it wears out…completely out. Most of us don’t need the latest, everyone-has-it item. Shoe polish, patches, sewing kits and duct tape fix most things. We don’t worry about what the neighbors think unless they think we might be rich.

The older I get, the more I know that it’s impossible to fight genetics. We may think that we are different from our grandparents but when it comes right down to it, we eat and drink the same almond pastries and cups of coffee as they did. My advice is to celebrate who you are and enjoy the crumbs on your shirt.