Math

Starting a new week is like beginning a math problem with positive and negative integers. Sometimes you move forward and sometimes you pivot the other way. Case in point. Our aging home is in desperate need of a few upgrades. Time and money are the usual roadblocks but we are determined to persevere and take one baby step at a time in hopes of maintaining a home we can sell before assisted living units start calling our names.

Last Saturday it was time to tackle the kitchen sink and the basement shower. My husband is a very skilled carpenter, but he knows that his expertise stops when it comes to the world of plumbing. He is also not one to watch eighteen YouTube videos in an attempt to learn how to install a garbage disposal from a guy with questionable credentials. So we hired a plumber to take care of the sink and shower details.

Oh my goodness, nothing says love like a garbage disposal that doesn't howl like a monkey and a kitchen faucet that doesn't leak and looks good at the same time. Three steps forward, for sure. Until I started up the vacuum cleaner. As I made a final pass over the hallway floor, the Suck-o-Master pulled in a chunk of a throw rug and began a horrific wheezing. I immediately shut off the machine and tugged the offending rug out of its mouth. All good. Maybe not. After hitting the start button, an acrid smell filled the air and no suction was evident. I've been down this road before. Time for a new belt. One step backward.

Next, the dishwasher. I ran my usual load of grubbiness in a machine that I'm sure is only two years old (which means that it's probably triple that number but who is counting). When the cycle was completed I unloaded the dishes and as I pushed the bottom rack back into place, I noticed a shimmering haze on the floor of the machine. Standing water. Drainage not working. One more step backward. It is the weekend so no service calls will be made without a serious hit to the bank account so suck it up and do the dishes the old-fashioned way. Another step backward.

Thanks to our plumber, the basement shower seems to be working without incident. A new shower head is still needed but we can install that ourselves. One step forward. Time to record a TV show for the evening. Good grief. One of the remote's arrow keys quit working. I attempted the usual interventions, new batteries, turning the TV off and on, banging the remote and willing it to work. One step backward. Finally, I forcefully pushed on the arrow key for several seconds and it chugged into a sluggish working order. Half a step forward. I'm quite sure this isn't going to cure the problem. We will be adding to our list of errands a trip to the cable service provider sometime soon. Another step backward.

I think I am on the deficit end of the number line this go-around, but it is best not to get too mathy about it all. Use the scientific method instead. My hypothesis is that our house and household appliances with eventually be in working order. Just not all on the same day.