Saturday, April 16, 2016

Rich



Wealthy will most likely never be a descriptor used next to my name. I don't know how to play the lottery so jackpots will not be falling into my lap any day soon. I am a teacher so large salaries and bonuses appear on other people's W-2 forms. I forget what day is cheap popcorn day at the nearby convenience store so I end up buying it for full price. And I lose coupons, only to find them after they have expired.

My local grocery store is trying to make this process easier by offering coupon specials that can be loaded electronically onto my rewards card. So far this process has resulted in the following messages:
"This device does not support your transaction."
"The username or password is incorrect."
"Give up. You are old and will not figure this out." (Okay, I made that one up.)

Recently, a lady next to me in the checkout line at the grocery store tried to save me from my ineptness with money-saving deals. Just as my package of strawberries was being scanned by the 12-year-old checker, the lady leaned over and said, "You know if you mention the Hy-Vee Facebook ad, you can get those strawberries for a lot cheaper." At that very moment, I sensed this was going to take an ugly turn. I could see in the checker's eyes that some clarification was needed. I quickly interjected, "That's okay. I don't usually mess with all that Facebook ad stuff." Undaunted, the young lady pulls out her smartphone and starts scrolling and tapping away. The checker intuitively surmises that the bulldog is not going to give up so he says, "Well, you have to show us the ad because it only applies to certain stores." The bulldog, still scrolling away, assures him that it applies to all the stores. The checker tenses up and starts in with a long explanation about the procedure involved with the Facebook ad. The bulldog is still scrolling and tapping away, determined to usurp the checker's knowledge of store protocol.

Meanwhile, an extended line is forming in our queue. It is early morning, there is only one checker, people are in a hurry, the bulldog is sure she is right and I have had it. I turned to the lady and thanked her for her concern over my small package of strawberries. I looked at the checker and said, "I do not need or want the Facebook discount on my fruit. I just want to finish my order and leave so I don't hold up this line." The checker was only too happy to fulfill my request. I grabbed the receipt and made haste out of the store.

I didn't look back, but my guess is the bulldog was still haggling with the checker over my strawberries after I was out the door. The only item in her order was a jumbo container of vanilla latte coffee creamer. Clearly, she was in need of some serious coffee intervention.

And, clearly, I will never be rich. But I did enjoy my strawberries, even without the discount. And the checker gave me another coupon for paper towels...no password, device or bulldog needed.





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